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Hello there,

I got out of a four month relationship a month ago. It was on and off, and tumultuous. I met this girl online who lived two hours away. We started dating and she asked me to be her girlfriend after two weeks. I said yes, but then started to freak out soon after that because I felt that it was too soon. I freaked out so much that I ended up breaking up with her, but we got back together. We broke up and got together numerous times. It was one of the most rollercoaster ride relationships I've been in. A lot of the issues did stem from her, and I know I stayed in it longer than I should have. So I ended up breaking up with her a month ago because I couldn't take it anymore. Within that week, one of my guy friends and I hung out, and he told me he had feelings for me. We started going on dates and hanging out a lot. About a week into hanging out with him, I decided to get back onto an online dating site. I just wanted to look. That same day I got on the site, this girl messaged me. She was beautiful and seemed great, so I responded. We went on a date, and then continued to hang out. I haven't dated more than one person in a while, and it began to stress me out. The girl wasn't comfortable with me dating another person, which made me think she wanted to be exclusive and I started to freak out in my head a bit. About a week ago, I realized that I wanted to stop dating my guy friend, because I see him as more of a friend, and I had more feelings for the girl. So I told her that I was going to stop seeing him, but I had to wait a week until he got back from a trip, because I wanted to do it in person. She was happy about that. So we spent a few nights together last week. On Friday, we were out at dinner, and the conversation kind of turned in an odd direction, and she asked me 'if i was ready to date'. I told her I didn't think that I was and that I wasn't sure, but that I really like her and don't want to lose her. I told her that I needed to figure things out in my head and take some time. She was really sad about this, as was I, because I really like her.

We didn't talk for a day and then she contacted me because she missed me. We ended up meeting up yesterday and I told her where my head was at. I told her that I think I am still hanging on to baggage from a relationship that ended two years ago, and that is why I haven't been in a serious relationship since and have only dated people where it wouldn't lead anywhere. And that in my 4 month relationship that just ended, I finally had opened up to a girl after not doing it in so long, only for it to end, and unfortunately be a stressful relationship.

I don't know what is wrong with me. But I am so anxious to date this girl, and I really really like her. When I touch her or look into her eyes it feels amazing. And I don't want to give that up. But I don't want to be so anxious and not know why. She told me that she didn't want to let me push her away and that she'd fight for me. I told her I needed a week to sort things out and have no communication with her. We decided to meet up in a week to see where we both stood.

I want to know where this anxiety is coming from. Especially since this is a person that I really like. Am I afraid of this being successful?

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