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Confusing Behavior
Jan 9, 2014
I had been seeing a guy for about a year who had just gotten out of a 7 year relationship so he said he didn't want to get serious. We have known each other since high school (I'm 23) and he cheated on his girlfriend with me a few years ago (I felt horrible and ended that, but it took him another year to confess it to his girlfriend). Things were rocky from the start because I wanted more, and he said things like he "could" love me. It screwed with my mind, and I thought if I gave him time it would work out. Back in November he told me very honestly that he was seeing a huge improvement in my mood, that I seemed really happy and that he was really happy for me, it felt like it meant a lot. A week later he saw a guy completely randomly kiss me out of no where at a party. He immediately told me he didn't want to "hook up with me if I was going to let random guys make out with me" it was completely unreasonable because we were not exclusive. When we talked about it later he claimed not to care and when I took a while to answer a text of his about it he just texted back "**** Off!" We didn't talk for a few weeks after that. I got a weird blank text message from him and a missed call at around one am about two weeks after he told me to **** off. I called him back a few days later, although I hadn't planned to. He told me simply he called because he was "drunk and wanted to ****." This is a guy who has good, kind friends who also think of him as a good person. I have never been treated this way by a guy before and I am extremely confused. I texted him the next day telling him that the next time he was "drunk and wants to ****" to forget my number. I didn't get a response and that was over a month ago. Please tell me what the hell this means? I want to move on, but I still care about him and don't know why he acted like this.

Please don't judge me for dating a guy who stated that he was unable to be in a committed relationship at the time due to the ending of a very long term one that ended badly. It was also his first ever relationship. I tried to understand where he was coming from.

For the most part I just want to know the most common reasons guys act this way, and if there is any hope in salvaging this relationship at a later time. If you want to tell me I was used, I acted like a doormat, etc. please save it.

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