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Relationship Health Message Board

Relationship Health Board Index

I've been dating my boyfriend for a year & a half now, but it doesn't seem like anything is really changing. We knew each other for 4 years before we started dating, these past 2 years he became my best friend and is still in that role. We waited six months before doing anything sexual. Things in that area are fine, I guess. Every weekend since last summer has been binge drinking and some kind of sex. It's okay, but it's so constant. I have always believed the sole purpose of dating someone was to one day marry them or at least commit in the long run. However, I don't really see that happening. I love him and he's my best friend. I could see myself marrying him. In the beginning it was always talks of one day marrying each other; i guess the beginning of relationships is always wishful thinking. Now I just [B]hint[/B] at moving in together and all the color goes out of his face. It makes me laugh in the moment, but ultimately it's kind of like a giant slap in the face. Before we started dating-- when I didn't think of him in a romantic sense-- I made the mistake of telling him that I didn't like clingy guys. I don't, but he takes that as if I don't like affection at all-- so I get none unless he wants sex. I'd like to hold hands and whatnot in public sometimes, but that doesn't happen. Sometimes I think "what's the point" if nothing is going to come out of it. I don't know. Some days it's so frustrating that I want to end it, but other days I'm fine with it. I think if I really wanted to break up with him, I would have already. My life is already a hot mess, I think I just think that it's better with him there. I don't know. It also feels kind of like a friends-with-benefits situation. I'm pretty sure what it sounds like. It's weird. We're dating but we're not. I'm just confused. I think it's just easier this way most of the time.

Right now, it's just fun and games. I'm 23; still "young" by mosts account. I think a lot about waiting until we reach the 2 year mark and then calling it what it is and bringing it to his attention. I don't know anything.


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