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Schizophrenia Message Board


Schizophrenia Board Index


[QUOTE=dave_81]Jesus Christ, does anyone truely believe that schizophrenia (in the vast majority of cases) has anything whatsoever to do with genius? Although (historically) there is a close relationship between genius and madness, can anyone honestly say that, since developing schizophrenia, their intellectual powers have been honed, that they have developed a greater insight into things? This is a wretched and cruel mental illness, plain and simple. And it really annoys me when people say that there's something positive that can be found in mental illness. There isn't. Everything about this illness is unrelentingly and irretrievably negative. Everyone with schizophrenia would like nothing more than to be 'normal' again, to have their 'old' self back. Instead, I, for one -- a lot of the time at least -- feel like a burlesque, a grotesque parody of my former self.

Schizophrenia -- a genius or a curse? The answer's so obvious, the question's not even worth asking.[/QUOTE]

..and it really annoys me--people who act as if they think they know what this illness is like for everyone else and that it effects everyone the same.
.. you should really speak for yourself and try to remember that while schizophrenia is USUALLY aweful in many ways for everyone with it, it is different for everyone and has different effects on everyone's life.

I have been having symptoms of schizophrenia since i was 3 years old...maybe younger, but i dont remember anything before age three. My life has always been "crazy" because of schizophrenia, and while this has caused me a lot of problems and held me back, I am also use to these symptoms and it is the only way i have ever known myself to be. For me, being schizophrenic is, in a sense,normal..and my way of coping with this horrible world.

Say if i had gone through life being completly normal with none of these symptoms, and suddenly..say when i turned 20, i was tormented by hallucinations and delusions and negative symptoms and thought problems-- Now, that would be aweful and i can imagine why it is so hard for the people who have had it this way: Going through life normally and functioning well, and then suddenly becomming schizophrenic, this would probably be horrible. I can't imagine. But i can understand why anyone in this situation would hate every aspect of the illness and try every medication or other method of treatment to make themselves normal again.

and yes, i can definatly say that because of this illness and the depression i have suffered, i have developed much greater insight.Ever since i turned 16 and my symptoms worsened and i became very depressed and was in an out of the hospitals, i think i have definatly matured much more than the average teen. This "illness" caused me to realize that such stupid little things are not important: like fitting in and looking cool, being the most popular person at school, wearing the coolest clothes, etc. I have also become more confident in many aspects because of my struggles.

I'm not saying that none of this hasn't been hard and scary and debilitating, because it has, but i also see that there are positives (at least, for me) of being insane.

imagine if you were normal and someone told you that you would be schizophrenic tomorrow for the rest of your life? (maybe this is how it happened for you) anyway, this would probably be aweful and scary, right? because you have always been use to being "normal"
....now TRY to imagine that you have been schizophrenic all your life. It is the only way you have ever known yourself to be. For you, it IS normal because you are so use to it and dont know how it is to be any other way. Your hallucinations and delusions have become something of friends and family to you. Now imagine that someone told you that tomorrow, you would no longer have schizophrenia.....believe it or not, but this would also be very frightening...at least that's how it is for me and this is why i've had so much trouble being on meds: because they take away most of my symptoms and make me feel "normal" and being normal is something i dont know anything about and i dont know how to handle it. I dont know how else to cope with this world without my symptoms.

-becka





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