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Schizophrenia Message Board


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I don't know... This is tricky. It sounds like you have some clear-cut symptoms of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder if you ask me, and I'm surprised that this hasn't been brought up. There's also some signs of mild schizophrenia or mania there, too. The fear of you vomiting is a common obsession- "What if I vomit right here? Everybody will be disgusted by me and I'll be an outcast." Also, the fact that you "believe" that your mother would poison your food could be an obsession because you've dismissed the thought as irrational and silly, despite still thinking that it could be true. Although fear of being poisoned is a common paranoid delusion in schizophrenics, this sounds more like a contamination obsession because you know it's not real. What really struck me as being OCD-like was the fact that you get "thoughts stuck in your head," and that you've mentioned that you've been having homicidal thoughts. What're these thoughts like? Do you think, "I want to kill my mom," even though this is repulsive to you and you know you'd never do something like that? Common obsession. I've had them. Perhaps these "homicidal thoughts" are triggered by you being angry at your mother, making you think that you really do want to kill her? The symptoms that reminded me of mania in bipolar disorder was that your thoughts go so fast and can become jumbled and that you have some hallucinations. The divide between what is schizophrenic and manic when referring to psychosis can be very ambiguous. I would definitely get a psychiatric evaluation to clear up the whole schizophrenia/bipolar/obsessive-compulsive thing... Good luck and God bless! :angel:
-GatsbyLuvr1920-
[QUOTE=GatsbyLuvr1920]I don't know... This is tricky. It sounds like you have some clear-cut symptoms of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder if you ask me, and I'm surprised that this hasn't been brought up. There's also some signs of mild schizophrenia or mania there, too. The fear of you vomiting is a common obsession- "What if I vomit right here? Everybody will be disgusted by me and I'll be an outcast." Also, the fact that you "believe" that your mother would poison your food could be an obsession because you've dismissed the thought as irrational and silly, despite still thinking that it could be true. Although fear of being poisoned is a common paranoid delusion in schizophrenics, this sounds more like a contamination obsession because you know it's not real. What really struck me as being OCD-like was the fact that you get "thoughts stuck in your head," and that you've mentioned that you've been having homicidal thoughts. What're these thoughts like? Do you think, "I want to kill my mom," even though this is repulsive to you and you know you'd never do something like that? Common obsession. I've had them. Perhaps these "homicidal thoughts" are triggered by you being angry at your mother, making you think that you really do want to kill her? The symptoms that reminded me of mania in bipolar disorder was that your thoughts go so fast and can become jumbled and that you have some hallucinations. The divide between what is schizophrenic and manic when referring to psychosis can be very ambiguous. I would definitely get a psychiatric evaluation to clear up the whole schizophrenia/bipolar/obsessive-compulsive thing... Good luck and God bless! :angel:
-GatsbyLuvr1920-[/QUOTE]
Thanks! I'm seeing a psychologist about emetophobia, but not about anything else. I don't know about mania or bipolar disorder, that just doesn't sound like me. I could be wrong.

I didn't know how common my fear of vomiting was, but it's not the same as you described. I'm not afraid of what people will think. I can't stand vomiting and it's an obsession, I'd rather die than vomit.

About the homicidal thoughts, I don't find it repulsive. Part of me would get angry hearing about killings, another part of me would be so excited by the thought of it at different times. I thought, I don't feel guilt. I don't want to kill family or friends. I'm very curious about whether I could do it or not. I don't want to go to jail, however. There was a period of time where I just really wanted to kill, but I wasn't serious about it, like I didn't plan anything. I was hoping for some things to happen and I really was acting strange, like it was all I thought about, and I would look at myself in the mirror and wonder what happened to the normal me.
I have had that happen to me in the morning when waking up.. they are called hypnopompic hallucinations and is not related to schizophrenia.. it can happen to anyone.. if you start seeing things like this when fully awake then it may be something more serious.. as for seeing things morph when you stare at them.. this has happened to me also if i zone out on something long enough and let my mind wonder... i do not have schizophrenia or any form of psychosis.. i just suffer from GAD & OCD





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