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Schizophrenia Message Board


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Hello... Good question.

I got, "psychotic paranoia," symptoms for the first time; when I was 18... Atleast thats the first time it happened so bad - that I had to act on it...

I grew up in an alcoholic family; my Dad was a drunk - but he would return to normal every once in awhile. It was a cycle, and apparently; it resembles bipolar disorder cycles of ups and downs now that we've looked back at it... It was very hard for us to understand the cycles... We became used to the conclusion - that it was my DAD's fault, that he was CHOOSING - to act the way he did... But I was wrong when I started to repeat some of the same behaviors that I had once, (In the past) been victim to...

Anyways, in the past - I remember seeing lots of stuff that most definitely traumatized me... I remember fights - screaming - I was pushed around a bit, and that certainly stunned me. I still remember vividly some of those episodes. However... The odd thing is; is I've never thought of those episodes as extremely traumatizing events... They were scary, but it wasn't the end of the world... I was able to brush them away - whenever my Dad would cycle back to his normal self - and be motivated to make a change... All would be forgiven, and in turn - forgotten... (Or atleast I thought...)

When I was about 16 or so years old, I played hockey... And one of our teammates had a father who was also one of our coaches... Between periods, they had a fight. Our team always thought there was alittle bit of abuse in this particular teammates home, it was just a hunch - but we always thought about it... His Dad was a big man, like a bear most of the time - BUT; when he exploded, he exploded... When I saw our coach grab his son around the neck, and push him against the wall - I was stunned... I couldn't move. Our entire team was watching, but no one was doing anything... They were just confused... I couldn't stand it, I walked around the corner and called to our head coaches; and they then came and broke up the argument / fight... When everyone had cleared the hall - I cried... For a long time. I held back the tears - but something had struck me... HARD... I felt the need to cry after the game - but managed to hide it...

I told my mom about this, and she immediately said, "You've got to talk to someone..." I brushed it away - laughing... Boy I wish now that I would have gone to see someone...

All I can say - is that as a child I DID see traumatizing things, ALOT! Verbal abuse, some physical abuse, alcoholism, etc... And its almost as if - at that moment; when my friend was grabbed around the neck by his dad; something came out of me that I'd managed to hide away, deep down - until that very moment in time... Something that NEEDED to get out, but something that I'd forgotten existed... Maybe it was something I wasn't prepared to accept just yet... But it came back...

Anyways, I think that the answer to your question is going to be near - to - impossible to find... Given that all of psychiatry is basically trial and error - and there is just no ABSOLUTES in its practise... I can only say, that in MY life; I HAVE had traumatizing events take place... And both my parents had traumatizing events take place... But so did my brother... And he is NOT psychotic... Neither is my mom, OR my dad... However we've started to wonder if my Dad is bipolar, now that my illness has sprung up questions of my upbringing - and its effects on my mental well being...

What I'm trying to say, is that; there are just too many variables in someone's life; to simply justify it with any kind of label... To simply say - that you've got schizophrenia... You've had psychotic thoughts and now you NEED these meds... Its even harder to justify a label; with reflecting on their past - GIVEN; that all people have different pasts... Not one is the same... NOT ONE... But in me and my brother's case; we BOTH; had to deal with my Dad, and his alcoholism problems... And so did my mom... So how is it; that I've become psychotic / paranoid - and my brother hasn't... And my mom hasn't... How is that possible; if in FACT; traumatic events lead to the deterioration of mental - well - being...?

Maybe, what you need to do, is answer your question, "Can; traumatic events worsen / exacerbate - symptoms / illnesses...?" With another question... Afterall - Psychiatry is simply masking an answer with another question... And because everyone whose ill is willing to accept any form of, "treatment," they'll most likely believe it... Without any questions...

"Do I have an illness?" - Thats my reply to your question... Thats my answer... Because ultimately - no matter where you seek answers from, no matter who you talk to about it... You will NEVER find an ABSOLUTE answer... Trust me on that! Psychiatry doesn't work that way...


Hopefully that helps ya out! :)


Thanks,





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