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Sexually Transmitted Diseases Message Board

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Well, here's my full story. It's rather long, but i'd appreciate any help or support, please!

In August or so, I found a large bump on the right side of my clitoris. It was about the size of a large pea. I freaked out! It looked like the cauliflower type that I'd seen on the internet (I've been worried about HPV before and did a lot of online research).

I made an appointment with Planned Parenthood and they took a look at it about a month later. By then, the pea sized bump had shrunken down to about half its size... but there was a tiny skin tag on the left side as well, and I knew I was really in for it. There was also a tag on my perenium.

HOWEVER, when I got examined, the doctor said she "wasn't convinced" that it was truly HPV. She called in someone for a second opinion and she too said she wasn't completely positive. They gave me an outside referral.

I was so worried and stressed and just started school in September so I had no time really to get to the hospital to make an appointment. By the time I did, I was told it would take another month to get an appointment.

I met someone in the summer and have been dating him for the past several months. I can't entirely say that he didn't give me HPV but I'm nearly positive that I've had this before I met him.

I took the Planned Parenthood doctors' uncertainty as a clearance and convinced myself that I don't have anything wrong with me. Now that I'm 3 days away from my scheduled appointment, I'm so scared. I looked in a magnifying mirror at my perenium and there's 5-6 bumps there that I can see. I'm afraid that waiting it out to get this appointment has made it spread.

Even worse, I'm afraid that I've given this virus to this guy that I really care deeply about. We've just told each other that we love one another and want a serious relationship.

I'm thinking about a way to tell him.. I don't want him to suddenly find warts on him and have him blow up at me (though I don't think he's the type to blow up).

I've been holding off on sex for the past week or so (we've had protected and unprotected, unfortunately) until my appointment this Thursday. I think I'm going to tell him that I have an annual ob/gyn checkup, and after the appointment I'll tell him that they found some bumps that they have to remove, and that it might be HPV.

Neither of us have really talked about our past sexual history, but I know he's had girlfriends in the past and a rather crazy college life (drugs, booze, but he hasn't said anything about girls), so there is definitely the possibility that he has been exposed to it already. I plan on asking him if he's ever had an outbreak or any symptoms. If he says no, I plan to tell him that it's possible he may be a carrier and that he had never had any symptoms but still passed it on to me. These are all accurate, yes?

I personally have never had these symptoms ever in my life, and am really scared out of my mind. I don't want him to leave me, not just because I'm afraid of being deserted and alone and humiliated, but especially because he and I really have had a beautiful time together and don't want anything to change that. I do know that something like this will likely cause some stress on both of us, but I do care about him and want this to work.

If you guys have any advice at all, I'd really appreciate it.. Thanks everyone.

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