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Sorry but I have to disagree with what everyone has said. Your boyfriend, who obviously loves you very much, has made a few mistakes. One very big one. The fact that he cheated on you is one thing, but can you imagine how he probably felt about it afterwards?
I honestly don't know why people cheat if they are happily in love, and I don't think myself or anyone else will ever know.
BUT
How would you feel if you were in his situation, had made a mistake, KNEW you had, and felt so awful?? Would you want your boyfriend to forgive you? If both of you truly love each other, then you both should forgive one another. I'm not saying that would be easy, because it wouldn't, but I believe in my heart that is what should be done.
I understand cheating is the most horrid thing one can do in a relationship, and yes, I do know how hurtful it can be, but we all do things that are wrong, and the worst thing is to be truly sorry for something you've done, and have the person you are apologizing to not accept.
Second of all, please don't let your friends 'tell you' who to go out with. I used to have a friend like this. There was this one guy, (now remember guys, this was back in the 7th grade, so I wasn't as mature as I am today), and he constantly broke up with me, but I liked him a lot...he was my 'first kiss', lol, so that was a big deal to me at the time. My friend would get mad every time she found out we were back together again, so I stopped telling her. As you can see, my situation is similar to yours.
What your friends are seeing, is someone they care about, who's gotten hurt. ALL of us girls will get hurt by the male sex in our lifetime. There's really no way around it. They aren't looking at the fact that he is deeply sorry. They are looking at the fact that he cheated on you by having sex with another girl. All I know is if my friend told me what you've asked us, I would be supportive of her. I would tell her, "Be careful hun, cause you know he's cheated on you and I'm not saying he'll do it again, because since he does love you, I'm sure he's very sorry, but I just want you to watch out and be alert because I hate to see you get hurt." NEVER, EVER would I make a friend of mine 'think', even if I was joking, that they couldn't come and tell me anything in the world.
Your friends should stop and think. If you truly love your boyfriend, then forgive him. God wants all of us to learn to forgive and forget, just like him, and although we don't have as great of power as him, it's harder for us to do the forget part.
I know he hurt you, but if people didn't forgive one another, especially in relationships, a lot of marriages wouldn't be successfull. My dad has said and done a lot of horrible things to my mother, and never has someone been as terribly sorry as him, and if my mom hadn't learned to forgive him, and let him know everything was OK, as long as nothing like that ever happened again, I wouldn't have a mom and a dad living in the same house as me.
I'm not saying don't be careful about this guy, because I know the trust factor between you two isn't going to be as good, but you can fully get it back. I promise you. Don't let go of this guy because he made a mistake.
Also, tell your friends you are with him. If they get mad or say anything rude to you, then they are not true friends. Any true friend would be supportive of anything. And when I say anything I don't mean friends should support you if you were like: 'Yeah I'm going to kill so and so'...I just mean anything like guys and such, they should respect. Because no matter what, we are all entitled to our own choices.
Don't ever feel like you can't do something in fear of how your friends will react. If they can't handle your decisions, then tell them to find a new friend.
You deserve better than that if that's how they act when they've found out you and your boyfriend are back together. I wish you the best of luck, hun.
Hope this is what you were hoping to hear.
Take care sweetie,
and hold your head up!

Lots of love to you,

Ashlee


[This message has been edited by AshleeD (edited 09-04-2002).]





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