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[QUOTE=Andrew29]Snails, let's just say you were doing this to me. How would you respond if I had called again and outright just told you that I thought you were a great person, and that I would think we would get along great. And I asked for an honest answer, even if it's no, as to whether you wanted to hang out sometime. Would you give an honest answer of no, or would you say yes, and continue this avoidance thing?

I'm a very honest and straight forward person; I like to tell it like it is, and I like to hear it like it is. This is why I really hate not knowing things for sure...which would explain why I really want to hear it personally from her that she doesn't want to get together.[/QUOTE]

Well, I think I would be pretty uncomfortable and try to get off the phone ASAP. I suspect that the last time you talked she felt this way and that's why she told you she would call you back, to get off the phone without having to give you a definite answer and risk hurting your feelings. I don't mean to brag or anything, but I've always had lots of guys interested in me and pursuing me. A lot of times they call and call and leave lots of messages before they get the hint that I'm not interested since I haven't called them back even once. It's just awkward and unpleasant to tell a guy I'm not into him, so I take the cowardly way out and just ignore them. Like I said before, it was very possible that she didn't get your message the first time you called, but if she still hasn't made an effort to call you back like she said she would, the chances are extremely good that she's not interested. It probably has little to do with you personally--maybe she's too busy to date anyone or already has a boyfriend. If you really want to know for sure, I guess you could call her one more time (but if she doesn't pursue you after that, please give up and make it easier on both of you). If I was her and you called, I would probably be as polite and non-confrontational as possible and say something like, "you're a cool guy and everything, but I'm just not interested in getting involved with anyone as more than friends." I doubt she would say yes and keep leading you on, but I did do this once (I agreed to a date and just never got back in touch with the guy to confirm plans.) Anyway, I wish you luck. You seem like a good guy and I'm sure some girl will really appreciate your honestly and effort--I just doubt this particular girl is the one for you. Her signals have been pretty clear so far, and I seriously doubt she'll change her mind, but you can always give it one more shot. You probably won't get a very candid answer, but hopefully she will at least be honest and then you'll know one way or another what she wants or doesn't want from you. Best wishes and take care.





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