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[SIZE=2]i'm sorry this is so long.. but ..i have been so pissed, sad, upset, hurt.. everything u could think of since the beggining of this summer. i was dumped, and i honestly dont have a clue as to why. i cant stop thinking about it, and its been months later. i really need help with moving on from this kid.
but anyways, this is how it all started. i went on a school trip this april to France with 9 other kids. i knew 2 of the girls that were going and thought it was just gonna be a good time with them, and i didnt even think twice about guys. but then i met "jim", we'll call him. he came on the trip with us. hes a grade younger than me (im a senior), and id never seen him in school or anything, but he was the funniest person id ever met and i was just drawn to him. at first, i didnt think twice about him, and i was just kind of like 'oh.. that kid thats on the trip with us...' but then he started flirting with me, and i started to get to know him, and he just had me under his spell.
he was so nice to everyone. he was like the "leader" of the group, he was the one everyone loved to be around. he included the kids that were being left out and made them feel a part of the group. he was just the sweetest kid ever.
we started acting like we were together on this trip even tho we hardly knew each other. we spent every day together walking around France. it was pretty much perfect.
one night in the hotel room he asked if this was just going to be a "vacation fling." i said definitely not.. and he said that he wanted to continue this when we went back to school. i completley agreed.
so, when we went back to school, things were awesome. he told his friends that i was his girlfriend, and that made me happy. (he DID act a little strange to me in school, like that i kind of wasnt there, and i had to confront him about it, and he said he was just shy in school, which seemed so out of his character.) we had lunch together everyday and we hung out everyday after school going back to his house to watch tv or go out to eat. it was perfect. no pressure or anything. we just had fun. i was so happy. my last relationship was HORRIBLE, with a HORRIBLE guy, and i just felt sooo lucky to have jim. (and as for his last relationship, well, he had never had one before and said i was the first girl he's ever really liked and ever "gone out" with, so he's pretty much unexperienced.. that could be a problem)
he'd tell me how he couldnt wait to visit me in college to see me all the time next year and to stay over at my new place.. we we're planning on seeing each other throughout the entire summer AND next school year and i couldnt wait!
not only was HE perfect, but he lives in an amazing house, his mom is extremely nice and successful, and his stepdad is my art teacher whom is pretty much like a father to me, and who planned the entire france trip w/ jims mom ( he would constantly complain about living in his house tho.. not everything between him and his stepdad was okay.. so that could be another problem) i was looking forward to having a close bond with his family.
so, my graduation night comes and jim is supposed to be there. he hadnt called me in 3 days which was kind of weird... i didnt let it get to me tho cuz it was graduation night. i had a feeling he didnt show up, so i went home kind of upset. he finally called me later that night and was being really rude to me. i invited him to go to my friends grad party with me thinking hed definitely say yes but he rudely said "no , im going out with my friends instead" so then i said.."okay, but we havent seen each other in a while" and he quickly snapped back with the famous line..."what?..i cant hang out with my friends??" so then we got in our first argument and he said "ill call you later" and then just hung up...well i called him later that night because he obviously didnt. we were talking normal, but i was getting bad vibes. all of a sudden he tells me that "somethings missing" and "we should just be friends." i was so devistated i didnt know what to say. i was more angry than anything. he didnt even give me an explanation and just said "ill call u later this week." well, a week passed and we had breakfast together, which was fine. you could tell we missed each other. thats the last time we hungout alone. now almost 2 months have passed and im still wondering what the heck he did it for. there were no signs of anything.. not one sign. he just FLIPPED.
but anyways... a couple weeks after breakfast, hed talk to me online and we would talk like we were friends, and i was compltely fine with that. i mean at least hes talking to me , right? so then i hear he has mono, and i didnt hear from him for a little bit.
then finally i talked to him one day online and he was being rude to me, so i asked him politely why he had a problem with me all of a sudden, and then he just SNAPPED again, telling me that i bother him, and all this stuff. so i just stopped talking to him. but then he continued to talk to me online like nothing happened?! then a couple weeks later, the same thing happened, except it was worse. we were having a pleasant conversation when all of a sudden he starts telling me how miserable i am and how depressing i am and how he cant talk to me because i constantly bring his mood down... it was so out of the blue, and trust me, no one has ever told me those things before. so i know its not true. he really has no reason to tell me that. after that, i just sat there so confused as to WHY this kid that once DROOLED over me and would do ANYTHING for me would snap at me so badly and say such mean things?
then, the kids that went on the France trip planned a reunion to get together to go out to dinner and stuff. i thought that this was a good time to try to make things better between me and jim. so the night before, he talked to me online and said sorry for being mean, and that he was just angry for no reason. i was really really happy that he apologized and admitted he had no reason to be mad.
i was so nervous before the "reunion" because i didnt know how we would act around each other after 2 months. believe it or not, when he showed up, he pretty much pretended like i wasnt even there!! he wouldnt even make eye contact or include me in his conversations, yet to all the other kids, he was acting as the friendly, funny jim that everyone knew him by on our trip to France, and just left me out. i just didnt get it. i was so hurt i wanted to leave so badly and just cry.
the next day, he talked to me online and told me that i was "miserable the whole day" and was acting like a huge b**ch to him, even tho i wasnt!! i was acting as pleasant as possible so nothing bad would happen, yet he tells me that i was being sarcastic and mean. i told him that if i WAS acting like that it was because i was still bitter and angry for him breaking things off with me for no reason. he then said to me "stop talking to me because i dont feel like typing anymore." and thats the last time i talked to him. i miss him so much.. more than anything. id do anything just to talk to him again and talk things out.

i dont blame u if you are as confused as i am. i still dont know what i did wrong, and i swear im telling the whole story. im too affraid to call him and ask or anything because he'll just snap at me!!
please , someone give me your take on this situation.
my question is.. why is he being SO cruel to me when he used to be the sweetest thing in the world?? what changed his mind? because i honestly cant see what went so wrong... i just need someones take on it.
thanks, and sorry this was so long and confusing.

it's literally all i can think about, STILL, and im so hurt by this. i honestly havent got a clue why hes being so mean and cruel..im affraid to go off to college still feeling this way. its made me feel worthless like i did something wrong, even tho i know i really didnt. thanks alot for reading all of this.[/SIZE]





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