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Relationship help
Oct 16, 2005
I am not 16, I am in grade 11, when I was in grade 8 I met this girl and he friend likeed me and that's how we met. In grade 9 she told me that she likeed me, I likeed her also, we talked every night almost and we fell in love. We hung out, and we did do sexual things. The most important thing to me was just being close to some one. She meant the world to me. I asked her to "go out" with me after talking for about a year. We went out for about 5 months, the best 5 months of my life. She is very popular at school, MVP for like every sport, I am popular I guess but it used to be for the wrong reason's, I used to get in a lot of fight's, because of my size 6'4 and 220 pounds people would always try to fight me and get they would land up getting a good beating, she was really close to some of the teachers due to the sports she played and I don't think that they likeed me a lot. But it was cool because she didn't seem to care about what people thought of such a good girl going out with a "bad boy". Any ways, we were going out for 5 months and went to dances together, spending a lot of time together. It all came to an abrupt stop on day when she said we needed a break. I was heart broken, I was always a tough kid and this is one of the few things that really really broke my heart. She told me that she saw us going back out and stuff, but 2 weeks later she was going out with some one else. I couldn't even talk to her since she wanted to still be friends. I didn't say a word to her for about 1 month and then suddenly there was an email in my Inbox asking me if I would please talk to her, she misses me and so on. I started talking to her and she told me that she love's me more then she love's her boyfriend and that she knows that I love her more then he BF loves her and that there were many times where she wanted to break up with him and go back out with me, I felt so excited. Well then my heart was broken again, she told me that she didn't think that she was going to break up with him right now. I told her that I couldn't talk to her because it hurt me to much, I stopped talking to her but I was so deppressed, I would come home from school and sleep, heck a lot of the times I wouldn't even land up going to school I would just skip with friends. I didn't talk to her for about 3 months and then she did the same thing, called my cell phone and told me that she wanted to talk to me and that loved me, we landed up hanging out and talking every night once again, (she was still going out with this guy, I FEEL LIKE SUCH AN A HOLE, he didn't know about any thing). One time when we were hanging out we kissed, then it turned into more, not sex but other stuff. I felt like wow, she most love me a lot, still she didn't break up with him. I said bye once again (I know this sounds so pathetic) and didn't talk for about 1 more month, she called me and told me that she so loves me and that she doesn't even care if he break's up with her and stuff. We hung out and did sexual things numerous times, and that was about 1 week ago, it's been about a week since we did stuff and she still hasn't broke up with him, she doesn't know what to do she say's, she say's that her heart is with me, that she love's me more and that she is much more comfortable with me but her head can't let him go. I don't know what to do? Every time I say bye I fall for her again. She mean's the world to me. Since we have broken up some girl's have likeed me but I couldn't like any one back, like I mean I kissed a girl that really really likeed me and I felt like garbage after because I know I didn't feel any thing for her. Any suggestion's on what to do? I need a change in some thing.

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