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Well doing that back then made you probably not the best girlfriend at the time. But having learned from it, moving forward, regaining trust and becomming a stronger person as a result makes you AWESOME! Really, if it's in the past, leave it there. As far as everyone telling you that you need to date other people and play the field a little......well I have a feeling it has more to do with trying to cool you and your boyfriend off a little more then anything else. My guess is your family, his family, see this bond, and really want the two of you to go to college, and not have children anytime soon. lol. If they advise you to play the field, it stops you from getting too close to anyone right away. If I were you, to put everybodies minds at ease, I would come up with some sort of promise. Something that says even if you guys decide you are absolutely the perfect match forever and ever, that you will finish school before anything too serious happens....i.e. marriage, babies, living together, etc. I think if you opened up that little bit with everyone, and the both of you made this promise outloud, then people might relax a little more. Also, if you promise, make sure you dont break it! Good luck!
Dear Sue:

Thank you for your response.
I especially appreciate your story about your sister and brother-in-law.
And I think I have moved on from that past, yet still afraid that I'd do damage. Yet I really feel like I never would.
Though at first I felt a pang of hurt because of your "red flag"
I consider it an insight. I feel that I do want to be in this relationship, because if I didn't, I would never feel inclined to post something here, since it is my motivation to move on from the not so great girlfriend I was.
I think personally, I know why I don't forgive myself so easily. I try to be perfect, and I feel I come up short to my boyfriend. Then again, I know he has flaws, just like everyone.
I think the guilt comes because this year, my mind suffered with intrusive, anxious, obsessive thoughts that caused me much stress and guilt: that I would cheat, leave him, hurt him, that I never meant anything sweet that I said to him. I haven't been diagnosed with OCD, but it seemed a lot like it...or just horrible anxiety. Also, I have an eye for beauty. I really do notice pretty people, and "good looking guys," but not once have I ever considered getting their number, or anything. It's an old habit of me observing the world. I always felt bad because later I'd go crazy thinking I was "mentally cheating" and I didn't want to be with him. But I do. I find him very very attractive, and he is dear to me. Thank you for your thoughts. :)

Dear Melissa:
Haha, I actually think that may explain it too! My mum had once asked me if I was actually going to stay with my boyfriend, and not date other people. She made it seem disappointing. It hurt a lot....that's why I worried, and I'd love her to support out relationship.

I have talked to my boyfriend about it, and he does plan on going to college, and does not plan to marry until he feels settled down, and babies are far from his mind, lmao. He also feels sex is only and only for when the relationship is stable, and the two have been together for a long time, and are ready and comfortable. I admire his values. I cannot promise anything since my dad doesn't really know about our relationship, (he might be very skeptical and ehh about it, so we're slowly giving him hints) but I will consider your suggestion! :]

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