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Re: Help me!
Jun 10, 2011
Hi Maddie,

I hope I can help a bit..I think it is unrealistic for you to wait until you are 18 years old to date your ex again. Relationships during your teen years should be kept light and fun, with no anticipation of lasting forever. I do not know how long it is until you are 18, but since the relationship is forbidden by your parents anyway, you should keep yourself away from him until you become an adult. There is a good chance that you will have changed your mind by then anyway. The teenage years are for discovery about yourself and what you want out of life. It is also time to get your education. The rest of your time should be having fun.

May I ask, how will your parents feel about you dating another boy, is that OK?

Another thing that should be important to you is establishing trust between you and your parents. Since it sounds like there has already been a big hit to your relationship with your parents with the ex, I would try and earn that trust back by keeping your lifestyle within the limits your parents have set for you.

You mention that you are afraid of ending up alone, I would put that out of your mind for now. The most important thing for you is to keep your life free of excess drama and confusion.

I encourage you to free yourself of your promise to your ex boyfriend, although I know it will be hard to. It is not fair of him to ask you to do so. When the time comes, and you happen to be over 18, and the ex comes along, you can then choose what you want to do. Until then, do what you wnat to do with whom ever you want to, which should include friends, both girls and boys, and your family, who are the most important people that will always be there for you and want the very best for you.

I look forward to hearing what your thoughts are now that you have had a conversation with the ex that did not go well. Could you fill us in on what that means?

I would encourage you not to have to pick one boy over another, but to allow yourself the freedom to do what you want. That will get you more that you will get by simply tying yourself down to another boy.

I hope we can help you with your decision...
janet





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